Red Bull Dreams.

Red Bull Dreams.

I tend to work random hours. At the moment, my job includes split shifts and working until 10:30pm around six days a week. Apparently, this is late for me now as I near the age of 27. Look out early bird specials, here I come. Due to this drop in youthful energy, I need the crutch that is energy drinking.

These make me sleepy? Makes no sense.
These make me sleepy? Makes no sense.

Maybe “needing” is a strong word. Most likely it’s become a bad habit and an attempt to trick my mind into thinking that it’s alert. I find myself buying one everyday at work in order to avoid the drowsiness that comes with my summer schedule. I knock it back quickly and I consider another one later in the day. What a terrible pattern. Maybe it’s the carbonation I love so much since I don’t include soda into my normal diet. Maybe it’s that distinctively “Red Bull” flavor that has become so addictive. I would attempt to explain the taste to you but, as you know, it’s indescribable and full of delicious.

Lately, I have noticed a trend where I drink a Red Bull and then, through no fault of my own, end up taking a nap about 30 minutes after I finish it. Tell me if I’m wrong, but I don’t think taking a nap is supposed to be on the itinerary after Red Bull consumption. I feel very tempted to write a disgruntled letter to Red Bull regarding my daily plight.

Dear Red Bull,

You are really letting me down. Please, fix it because I would hate to have to switch energy drinks. I very much like the taste of you better.

Much love (but also frustration),


All that aside, yesterday I drifted off into dreamland for the second time this week after taking down one of these so-called beverages of energy boosting and weird things happened. Have you ever taken a nap with the TV on and you feel as though the whole time you were asleep you could still hear everything that was happening on “Dateline”? Or “Man vs. Food”? Or “Duck Dynasty”? Or “insert show title here”…I don’t know what you watch.

That was me today. I could hear everything that was happening on “Mysteries at the Museum” and yet, simultaneously, dreaming my very own dreams. Do I remember these dreams? No. But I did receive one clue as to what may have been going on in my Red Bull-infused brain during that 15 minute nap. Literally seconds after I woke up, my half asleep self sent this enlightening text:



Clearly, whatever I was dreaming was not fun times. Was I being chased by little monsters with Red Bull cans for bodies? Am I replacing too many nutritious snack time opportunities with energy drinks and my subconscious wants me to know that I could use a bit more sustenance? We may never know.

What we do know is: Beware the Red Bull dreams. They are scary. And make you hungry.

Thanks, Tired Self.

Food for thought: Why is taurine in my energy drink and also in my contact solution? Seems wrong.

5 responses to “Red Bull Dreams.”

  1. What about going to bed earlier, getting more sleep, and exercising more? Seems the caffeine isn’t working for you.

  2. Maybe you are tired because you are drinking the Sugar Free version… 🙂

    And…bile from inside an ox’s large intestine sounds pretty scary from the get go…

  3. Hahaha, yeah “ox bile” is a common misconception when it comes to taurine but *surprise*, it’s an amino acid that your body makes already. Tell me if this helps

    Courtney, are you getting enough water? Sometimes caffeine doesn’t help you fight fatigue if there are other fatigue-inducing factors such as dehydration. Other factors, such as how quickly you consume an energy drink, can also affect how effective caffeine is. Do you normally consume one can of Red Bull in less than 20 minutes? Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help. This is sort of my area of expertise

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